I wouldn't wish this on anyone

Right now, I feel like someone has removed my heart and is wringing it out like a dirty dishtowel, until every last drop of water falls to the sink below.

Basically that is how it feels to write a letter to a loved one in preparation for an intervention. It’s painful enough to drudge up all of the muck, let alone organize it, and present it with a big ribbon of love.

All day and night I have been drafting this letter and it feels like an impossible task, where any outcome is bound to be a painful one for every person involved. My energy is zapped, and all the pain that has been buried deep down, like some dormant volcano, is now rising to the surface, with all of it’s bubbling, molten lava looking for some outlet; anywhere to go- the best route possible, without taking any casualties. There are so many good reasons why this particular volcano never needed to erupt- however, I hope that for both my loved one, and myself that we will look back and be grateful for this moment in time. Perhaps it will be a turning point in us individually and towards each other. Perhaps, we will find freedom in areas of our lives where we were unaware of our chains.

So for tonight, I press on, committed to doing my part; I will do what it takes to express the deepest and even the darkest places within my past and those I carry with me in my heart, if it means a chance at redemption for all!

I cling to Hope, because Hope clings to me- refusing to let me give up!